its funny how god works in people's lives. how he uses his children as tools to reach his other children. but it is all to glorify him. none of it is for us. its amazing. and so humbling. but this morning i was reading my bible...actually flipping through it is more like it. :-\ and i found this quote. by the way: i have a chicken soup bible, its kinda like the books, so there are all sorts of little bits of inspiration and stories scattered throughout the bible. its actually quite reassuring. but this morning i found this one quote in the middle of second chronicles:

I thought that was so amazing. and so true. We get on our high horses and think we are so wonderful and we are so proud. But compared to what? Compared to the other small individuals that surround us. God is so vast and so mighty. He is! WE are HIS servants. We do control our own lives, but for what? To glorify Him. We were created to worship, not to idolize ourselves. Amen! It is just so amazing to imagine that someone that amazing is in love with you and me! He died for us....i just cannot fathom (what a word lis) it! how can someone so beautiful, perfect, and, amazing claim me as his?

Did you know that if you were the only person in the world God would have sent Jesus on a rescue mission to save you. just you. he loves you that much.

how awesome.

and then i was reading my favorite verse: Ephesians 4:11- He is the one who gave these gifts to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and the teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God's people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ.

It goes along with another verse in 1st Corinthians 12:27- Now all of you together are Christ's body, and each one of you is a separate and necessary part of it.

As an individual, we cannot do everything, and we are not made to do everything. that is something i have always struggled with...wanting to do everything. but everytime i read that, im just humbled. im just one individual, but im a beautiful individual. im a part of a body that needs me, without me it would not be complete. if that doesnt make you feel needed, i dont know what does.

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but anyways...in my non-spiritual life: meredith is coming to town! how exciting! and yesterday me, my mom, and brandon went shopping and then to the hospital. my step-grandmother has SIX bypasses...that is alot for the body to recover from. especially if she is nearly 75 years old. she wasnt having a good day yesterday, she was in alot of pain and she just looked awful. she looked beautiful, but awful becauase she was suffering. shopping was fun. it wasnt that bad actually, and i got a few ideas for brandon...thank you JESUS! and i bought my mom's present and let her carry it out...well she did pick it out. and then...then she wrapped it! thats my favorite thing to do is wrap presents...i love it and she just couldnt wait. uh huh...lol. jk. there will be more to wrap. its just kinda bad that my mom picked out, carried, and wrapped her own present. its a very nice double broiler in stainless steel. if you are wondering. she wants it to melt chocolate. yummm. me and kate are going to have fun with that one. dipping graham crackers and strawberries in godiva chocolate...unbelieveably good.

well im sitting here with my mom on this monday morning, typing on my laptop on the couch while watching ellen. its wonderful. she is wrapping presents and just got done making fudge...how festive is that! we are both in our pajamas and my dog is laying at my feet. if that doesnt scream christmas i dont know what does.

i do miss my daddy though. its coming up on ten years since he committed suicide. i kinda wonder how different my life would have been with him in it all the time and just what this time of the year would be like with him in it. how amazing to imagine. but hey like i always say: you cant know the sweet without experiencing the bitter. i know in god's perfect plan that it is in his will for me to be truly and unbelievebly happy.

HAHAHA my mom just locked my cat outside...that cat that i cannot STAND! oh how funny. and she is going to let it back it...cause she is weak. jk. i love her to death. she is not only my mom, but my sister...we get along like best friends, she knows EVERYTHING about me...EVERYTHING...ever little thing ive ever done, ever mistake, and ever accomplishment, and she still loves me. its amazing. well i just looked at the length of this blog and maybe i will have to break it up...nah...! enjoy loves and leave some love on any part of it you want. have a wonderful day and remember god provides!

jesus loves you this i know, for he died and proved it so.